10 Tips How To End Self-Sabotage & Bring Your Weight Loss Success to The Next Level

Self-Sabotage (2)

Over the course of this year we talked about self-sabotage several times. I dare say that self-sabotage is one of the biggest obstacles keeping women from losing their weight and keeping it off. And the real bad news about self-sabotage is that it is almost to a 100% subconscious. In other words, we don’t even know if and when we are sabotaging our goals. That one fact makes losing weight a real challenge.

But for every challenge and problem there is always at least one solution.

Today I want to talk about ten possible ways to end your self-sabotage and to bring your weight loss success to the next level. The time for new orientation is perfect, because in a month from now you will begin to feel that strong inner desire to give your weight loss goal another try. Come January your motivation will peak and then you will be happy to have some new information and possibilities to finally get a handle on your excess weight.

Here are my 10 tips:

  1. Hire a coach: this is by leaps and bounds the best, strongest, fastest, and most effective way Coachingof recognizing where you sabotage your own goal and learn how to end it. The better and more experienced your weight loss coach is the better and faster she can spot your hidden saboteurs and lead you to the path of accomplishment. This can be through live consultations or over the phone.
  2. Join a group coaching program: if you can’t afford a coach for yourself, then joining a group coaching is the second best solution. Although the coach has to divide her attention between several individuals, she can still spot your blind spots and lead you through the necessary transformation process. This too can either be through live consultations or over the phone.
  3. The buddy system: if for whatever reason you don’t want to choose one of the first two options, then it’s highly recommended to at least find a buddy. The only disadvantage here is that your buddy most likely has her own blind spots and self-sabotage patterns. Besides, she may still be fixated on the dieting-exercise approach what will not bring you much further. But it’s still better than doing it alone, especially for the exercise part.
  4. Schedule every single step and stick to it: if that’s not an option either, then you’d have to test your willpower. One way to do that is by scheduling every single step ahead of time and making it a habit to stick to it. For most women this works best, when they mark their calendars and reserve a time spot for whatever step they want to take.
  5. Self-reflection: this is not an option – it has to be part of every way you choose. If you choose a coach – be it for one-on-one coaching or for a group coaching, your coach can spot your blind spots. Still, you need to do some self-reflection to accept those blind spots. If you go through the weight loss process alone, you’d have to be very good and experienced at self-reflection. It can be done.
  6. Apply the 21-Day principle: Some months ago I offered you my free Weight Loss Habit Hack. In that free program there is the 21-Day principle included. The trick is to change habits one by one simply by sticking to one new habit for consecutive 21 days. Of course, in my free Weight Loss Habit Hack I share more information, but this is how it’s done in a nutshell. It’s easier to stick to one habit for three weeks than starting with a process you think you have to do for the rest of your life. Although you have to, it’s still easier psychologically just to think about the first 21 days. Once you’ll have accomplished that, it will have become a new habit and will be much easier to stick with it. If you didn’t get your own Weight Loss Habit Hack yet, you can claime your copy in the box at the right side of this page. 
  7. Join the 30-Day Challenge: if you’re on a tight budget but still need some clear guidance and live support, then the 30-Day Triple Power Weight Loss Challenge may simply be ideal for you. It gives clear daily directions in baby steps so that your subconscious mind has enough time to adjust without sabotaging your weight loss process. And it costs less than $50. That program addresses several aspects of weight issues and it also comes with 4 weeks of live group coaching over the phone.
  8. Consult a behavioral therapist: that is almost as good as having your personal one-on-one coach. A behavioral therapist can quickly and easily spot your self-sabotaging tactics and help you eliminate those. The only thing she can’t offer is the experience and expertise of a weight loss coach. So, after she has helped you eliminate your self-sabotage, you’ll be asking yourself, “What’s next? How can I proceed from here?” You can consider yourself lucky if you can find both professions in one person.
  9. Stop the excuses: this possibility requires a lot of self-reflection. But when you’re used to self-reflection and honest to yourself, then this could be a great beginning. Once you have trained yourself not to use excuses anymore, you have eliminated a giant obstacle.
  10. Stop the quick-fix mentality: believe it or not, but one of the biggest obstacles that are standing in women’s way to losing weight is their quick-fix mentality. As soon as they decide to lose some weight they want to achieve that instantly. Unfortunately many forget that they didn’t gain that weight within a month or two, and they also lack a deeper understanding of how their body really works. To make matters worse they hear daily that they could lose 10 pounds in as little as 10 days and thus are completely mis-lead by some greedy marketers and false gurus. When someone tells you that you can lose that much weight in such a short time, then he or she is a crook. Sometimes it may go that fast, sometimes it may go even faster, during some phases however it will be much less than that. And then there are months you will not lose any weight at all. This is normal and part of weight loss. Your body is not a machine. Too many then give up because they think that there was something wrong with them instead of questioning the diet or program. The sooner you understand that, the faster you can begin to make some real, serious, and lasting changes.

Self-Sabotage (3)If you think that overcoming self-sabotage could be tough, then you have my full empathy. It is probably the toughest part of the whole weight loss issue. However, there is no way around, if you’re serious about losing your weight because fighting against yourself is very energy consuming. There is no diet that can overcome that obstacle in your behalf.

However, there are solutions to overcome those stumbling blocks. It’s not always easy, and I think every weight-struggling woman can testify that. But with those 10 steps you can achieve great results, especially with items #1, #2, and #8. Not every person is equal. Some need more time and others need less time. I have seen breakthroughs in my coaching programs in as quickly as two weeks. It all depends on how open and how willing you are to eliminate your personal saboteurs. And once those saboteurs are eliminated, the weight loss process goes much smoother, faster, and easier.

Here’s to your final weight loss success,

Angela B.

behavioral therapist and weight loss coach since 1984

 

How Excuses Obstruct Your Weight Loss Process (Part 2)

Excuses (6)I don’t have time

“I don’t have time” is another lie we have come to believe is true. It’s not true and yet, how often do we all use it!? We have all been given 24 hours every day, 7 days a week, 365 days per year. And the greatest gift we were given when we came into this world is the FREEDOM to use these 24 hours as it pleases us. Well, this is not exactly true. Let me put it this way: we have been given the choice of how to make the best of our 24 hours a day. So it is not about time, but about our priorities and how we use our time. It is a CHOICE, not a fact.

Using this gift of time for making money is certainly not a wise choice. I know, we all need money and some of us work so hard and yet make hardly enough to make ends meet. But we cannot use this as an excuse for not making a better and wiser use of our gift of time. The situation we are in is a result of the choices we have made in life, whether or not we like the outcome.

Excuses (5)I recently saw a cartoon, about a doctor asking his patient, “What fits your busy schedule better, exercising 1 hour a day or being dead 24 hours a day?” Ouch!

Using the excuse, “I don’t have time” to take care of our health is about the most stupid excuse we can ever make. If we do not take care of our health appropriately – and excess weight is a disease –, we automatically shorten the time we have on this planet – we shorten our life. Ask yourself how much time you could gain if you would stop watching TV for a while. Statistics tell us that an average adult watches television eight years of his or her entire life. Eight years! And I guess it even gets worse with social media. Just imagine what you could accomplish in eight years and how your body would look like if you just used a small part of it to take care of your health, to exercise and move your body.

“I can’t afford it”

Similar to “I don’t have time” or “I can’t,” this is another classic excuse. And still, this is widely BELIEVED by millions of people. I have no doubt that you could show me your bills, your paycheck, your cost of living, and your budget to prove the accuracy of this statement. I was living below the poverty line for years, so I know what it’s like to have more wishes than money.

The quote, “You can either make money or you can make excuses, but you can’t do both” is very much true. The one excludes the other. While some use the excuse “I can’t afford that,” others go out and make the money they want and need. There are always better paying jobs available – even in bad economic times. There are even jobs for chronically sick people who have to work from home. We are living in a Universe of abundance. It is not life that makes us poor, but our own belief system and our excuses.

How about this?

You can either lose weight or you can make excuses, but you can’t do both.

Please ask yourself the following question again:

“Can I afford NOT to take better care of my weight and health?” Let me repeat this:

Quote1Can you?

I cannot answer this question for you. Only you can answer it for yourself.

Do you know how much time you have left? No one knows. And even if you have a lot of time left in this life (although when we come to the end of our lives we suddenly feel that it was never enough), is your current life so good that you would want to go on with it until the end?

 

Choices

happy slim womanLike time, money or the lack of it is not a fact but a matter of priorities. We all do have money, otherwise we would be dead by now. If we cannot earn it, we get it from the government or through some form of social assistance. The truth is that we are making choices every day for what we want to spend our money on. We have our priorities in life and according to these priorities we spend our money. For instance, if your TV broke down today, what would you do to buy a new one? How about your car? Isn’t it interesting that most people find a way to get a new car or a new TV set, but very few go that extra mile to invest in their health?

What would you say if I told you that I have proof that it is not the lack of money that is holding you back from reversing your weight? There is so much evidence of that truth that I do not even know where to begin.

Many, many experiences with people have proven to me over and over again that it is not about the money. And it is not about a lack of time either. 80% of the whole slimming process has to come from within anyway. And this does not cost a dime. How much cheaper than gratis can it get? Keep in mind, you obviously had enough time to become overweight. Reversing this weight won’t take up more time than becoming overweight.

When people ask me how long the weight loss process would take, I usually say that it might take between six months and two years, depending on the weight a person wants to lose. Sometimes it can be done faster, sometimes it takes longer. Sometimes a person can lose her weight within a very short time, but this can only happen when that person has done a lot of inner transformation in the past and is able to let go almost immediately. So, I am not saying that it cannot happen. As a matter of fact, it could happen even as quickly as within a few months. It happened to me. Experience shows that losing weight can take several months and up to a few years.

It depends on numerous factors, such as the ability to let go, the faith, the beliefs, the determination, how easily a person can spot inner blockages, insight into and understanding of their inner causes, etc. It depends on so many things that I have no control over. Only the client alone can determine how soon or fast this will happen. And this is something that cannot be done with the intellect. It must come from the heart. That’s why working with an experienced coach can drastically reduce the time it takes to achieve your final goal.

Now this answer of mine gives many of the weight loss clients another excuse: “It takes too long.” How long do you guess it took the weight to build up? Your excess weight did not appear within a month and it will not go away and stay off within a month.

And here is another provocative question. How long does it take to lose that weight by yo-yoing?

Forever.

One step forward and two steps back – as this is the normal result of diets – does not get you anywhere but heavier. So you didn’t gain anything by going the fast route.

Just ask yourself this: “Where will I be and how will I feel in a year from now, in two years from now, in five year from now, if things will go on like this?”

Excess weight can only be reversed by you in cooperation with the body in order to make it last. And the reversing process takes time. So let me ask you again, “Where will you be and how will you feel in a year/two years/five years from now if you go on like this?” I can give you the answer: At the very same point where you are right now, if not worse, with a few more pounds accumulated. Face it.

But where will you be in a year from now if you stop the excuses right now, start the weight loss process today using a real weight loss strategy vs. a short-term diet? You certainly will not be at this point anymore, and you will definitely have learned a lot. If you do it right you most likely will have lost dozens and dozens of pounds by then, and enjoying a slimmer body and better health in general. The results will depend on how quickly you allow yourself to get to the core of the problem. If you do it right, most people will have achieved their final weight goal within one year and the very heavy ones within two years.

Just think back how fast the last 12 months went by and imagine where you could be today had you started 12 months earlier. This thought process will immediately get you on the right track and give you the motivation you need to start right away.

So do you think it would be worthwhile to undertake that journey? Would it be worth your while to take some time, to apply some of the things you learn through what I share in blog posts, teleclasses and workshops, to spend some money for your health, to do some exercising, etc.? And most of all, can you afford not to do it?

I wish you good luck on your way to a slimmer body and better health!

Angela B.

P.S. Are you ready to say goodbye to your excuses? Are you ready to say goodbye to some of the fattening habits and turn them into slimming ones? Are you ready to forget the excuses, “I don’t have time”, “I can’t afford”, or “I can’t now” now and give yourself a real chance to finally get rid of your excess weight once and for all? If you think that your health and weight goal is worth a one-time fee of $49 and 5-10 minutes of your time per day for the next 30 days, then you want to check this out.  http://www.sheslimfast.com/30daychallenge2015-2/

 

[Missed part 1? You can access it here!]

How Excuses Obstruct Your Weight Loss Process (Part 1)

Excuses (1)“It’s in my genes.” “I can’t afford it.” “I don’t have time.” “I have an incurable disease.” “It’s impossible.” “I’m too old/too young.” “It’s too hard.” “I can’t.” “I’m not strong enough.” “It runs in the family.” “I’m not fat, I have a large bone structure.” “I don’t have enough willpower.”

These are all excuses that keep you from reaching your weight loss goals and living a healthy and fulfilled life.

But are they true? 

They are not. All excuses are untruths and misalignments. They are just that: excuses. Excuses are never based on the truth but on what currently feels convenient. 

Excuses (3)Everything we do or don’t do in life is a choice. The unhealthy lifestyle is a choice, just as surely as the healthy lifestyle. Who can change our lives, if not us? We have been given everything we need to live the life we feel deep inside that we are meant to live. 

Underestimating ourselves is not really a compliment to our creator. 

No matter how overweight you are, no matter how ill you are, no matter how old you are, no matter how tired you are, no matter how little money you have…there is a way out of your current weight situation. But never forget one thing, you have to show up. You have to take the driver’s seat. You have to be on your own health and weight loss team. Without your collaboration, no one on earth can ever help you to become better. You could have the best weight loss coach on earth, yet she couldn’t help you if you don’t show up.

 

The effect of excuses

When you are using excuses like “I’m too old,” “I’m too sick,” “I’m too tired,” or “I can’t afford it,” you are saying nothing else but that this Universe is not working, that it’s not perfect enough, that it has flaws, that the Creator has made mistakes. Well, could it be that – just maybe – we are the ones who are making the mistakes? 

Excuses are nothing less than limitations that prevent us from changing anything in our lives for the better. Excuses enable things to remain as imperfect and bad as they are. They make us feel weak, little, unfit and unable. They make us feel like victims. Excuses are the greatest dream killers there are. They make us un-free. We create limitations for ourselves that do not even exist, and thus build a cage around ourselves. We literally lock ourselves up.

“We have more ability than will power, and it is often an excuse to ourselves that we imagine that things are impossible.” –Francois de la Rochedoucauld

Excuses (3)By using excuses and believing in them, we are unable to live our life’s purpose. When we are on purpose, our inner guidance shows us step by step what we have to do. But when we are using excuses, we not only cannot see these steps, we are unable to take them because we are limiting ourselves. A life of purpose is not possible as long as we use excuses. 

Then our excuses, or at least our willingness to believe them, are happily used by those who intend to manipulate us. They tell us that it’s all our fault that we haven’t been able to lose weight yet, that we’ll be forever unable to lose weight, we’ll be fat for the rest of our lives, and poor to boot, etc. This is how we can be manipulated. Of course, they will offer the ‘appropriate’ answers or cures, and this is seldom cheap. The more we allow these people to infiltrate us with fear, the more easily we can be manipulated, and the more they can benefit from us financially. 

All too often we forget that all the answers are within us. As soon as we realize who we are and recognize that we have been given all the power we need in order to change our lives, to attain and maintain a slim and healthy body, miracles can happen. And they do happen.

“Truth be told, you really don’t give a hoot about what somebody else ‘can’t’ do. But hey, guess what? Nobody wants to hear any of your excuses either. That’s right; nobody cares about what you can’t do. N-O-B-O-D-Y.” –Greg Hickman

“I can’t”

The excuse “I can’t” is very widespread – and it is a lie. Of course, we do not lie purposefully, but we use it subconsciously in order not to have to take a leap of faith and challenge our self-made limitations. If we listen deep inside ourselves we find out that it is not that we are not able or capable of doing something, but that we do not want to. The explanation “I can’t” is used too easily and too often. And the problem is that we start believing it ourselves……sort of. Of course, deep down, we know that this is not true. 

Believing that you are overweight because you have a large bone structure is exactly the same as saying “I can’t.” It’s like saying, “It’s not in my hands whether or not I’m going to lose weight,” “I can’t change my habits in order to lose weight,” “I can’t exercise,” “I can’t live a healthy lifestyle,” “I can’t quit smoking,” “It can’t be done,” “I can’t eat healthy,” “I can’t do without my coke.” 

Only when you listen carefully to other people’s excuses will you realize how ridiculous they really are. But we are far more tolerant of our own excuses. By believing that we “can’t,” and that weight loss is difficult, we are destroying our lives – nothing more and nothing less. It is not the overweight that is killing us. It is our own belief system and the excuses we make day in and day out. 

By telling ourselves or others that we can’t, we limit ourselves tremendously. We’ve known for decades that human potential is simply enormous and that most people use less than 10% of their brain capacity. We have absolutely no idea what we might be capable of. How can we say “I can’t,” when we haven’t yet tried out all the possibilities? Likewise, how can we state that it’s impossible to lose weight since we have not yet turned every stone? 

Recently I received an email from a free member and she asked me why she should pay for my  Membership Program. She went on to tell me that she has been searching for solutions for 3 years and that she has already spent thousands of dollars. Guess what! Maybe she has to spend 3 more years and thousands of dollars more until she will find her answer. It took me 13 years and thousands of dollars to find the answer to my weight problem.

Yes, sometimes we come to the point where we get tired and discouraged. That is okay. It is part of life. But just because we have not yet found the answer we are looking for does not mean that we should give up. The problem, however, with this lady is that she is standing in front of a door that could give her the answers she is so desperately looking for, and she does not even realize it. She has arrived and is not able to see it. Why? Because the concept “I can’t,” “nobody can help me” and “I’ve tried everything and nothing worked” currently is stronger than the awareness that the answer is right in front of her nose. 

Excuses (4)I’m not blaming this reader or anybody else. It is not my job to judge or to criticize. We have all been there. We all have our blind spots. 

The truth is, there is nothing in the whole Universe that could not be solved, as long as we act within the Universal Law. We literally live in a limitless Universe. There is no limit to healthy foods, there is no limit to money, there is no limit to beauty, there is no limit to perfection……Limits have been overcome in history over and over again. 

So our response to challenges should not be “I can’t,” but HOW can it be done?” This shift in attitude suddenly opens doors and new possibilities we have never seen before. 

If you’re ready to stop the excuses and start changing your bad habits, check this out. This is a free teleclass about how to replace fattening habits by healthy, slimming ones.

(Part 2 will be published in one of our next issues)