Weight Loss Psychology – How To Deal With Emotional Eating

Emotional eating is an issue many overweight women are struggling with. The problem is that they don’t understand the real cause behind emotional eating and thus try to tame the beast with willpower.

This is a completely useless strategy because when you do that, you deal with two completely different levels of your being. Willpower comes from your mind (will) and the emotional eating – as the word implies – has to do with emotions. Emotions can’t be dealt successfully with willpower. And Dr. Carol Solomon, one of the weight loss experts I have interviewed – a specialist in emotional eating – explained why willpower is not a good strategy to overcome emotional eating.

Dr. Solomon, a psychologist, has struggled with the same 20 pounds over and over and over again. She said that she was definitely a compulsive eater and that she was really obsessed with food. It occupied a lot of time and space in her head and it just caused her a lot of angst, a state of mind she didn’t like at all. She kept going up and down in her dieting with a lot of yo-yoing, which caused her a lot of problems.

She said that although many overweight women may think, “Only 20 pounds…lucky her,” that to women it doesn’t really matter whether she is 20 pounds overweight or 50 pounds or 100 pounds. The vicious cycle aspect of feeling that you’re going round and round and round with the same issue over and over is always the same, and so are the struggles.

“That’s the frustrating part that it’s so discouraging for people and I think maybe people with more weight to lose feel even more discouraged. But to me it’s just frustrating, it’s discouraging and it’s demoralizing really,” Dr. Solomon said.

When I asked her what the reason for our obesity epidemic in the Western world might be despite of the fact that we have so much food to choose from, she said, “There is definitely something wrong in the system and there are a lot of factors that contribute to that. I think the whole world is feeling so much stress. People who work in corporate jobs are functioning with so much pressure and so much uncertainty. People are so overwhelmed with their lives; and overcommitted. There are so many demands and responsibilities and less support, and less social interaction; which is one of the keys to happiness. Stress is really equivalent to what smoking was in the 50’s. It’s killing us. One of our favorite responses is to overeat and I think that people just don’t make time for themselves and they just don’t pay attention. There is a lot of unconscious eating going on until something happens and then you say: Okay, I’ve got to do something about it.”

Stress is a huge factor regarding weight issues and a huge trigger. Stress leads to a variety of negative emotions which are mostly ‘undigested’, and we have to do something with them. So food is just a quick and easy answer and comes in handy, although it really creates more problems we can’t deal with.

When I asked her what she thinks about diets, Dr. Solomon answered, “Well, I think that we all know that diets don’t work, and that diets result in a net gain. I think there was a study once that showed that people on diets gain back a 107% of the weight that they lost. So, all the weight that they have lost plus 7%, and yet there is a $50 Billion diet industry out there. That’s a lot of money no matter what currency you are talking about. It just shows how desperate people feel to find an answer.”

“Diets create dependency on something that’s outside of you,” she continued. “Diet programs would have you believe that if you’d relax your guard, you’ll devour everything inside. So if you believe that, then it’s natural to start depriving yourself so that you won’t gain weight. So, it’s either one or the other all the time. You are either devouring or depriving; starving yourself or stuffing yourself.”

I have often discussed why diets are counter-productive from a physical standpoint. Now you also begin to understand why dieting for weight loss is even a bad idea psychologically. I think it’s really time to begin questioning the dieting approach for maintainable weight loss. 

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But what is the answer?

If you want to lose weight, you can do it simply by eating when you’re hungry and stopping when you’re satisfied.

Can it be that easy and simple?

“…that’s frightening to many people, because that means taking responsibility and trusting yourself. So a lot of people believe that they have to have this sort of outside structure, this sort of outside control of a diet but it never really works. To do something different; you are going against all the machinery of the culture especially that $50 billion diet industry.”

And, oh boy, can they fight hard to keep you struggling and silence those weight loss experts who dare to speak out the truth. I could literally fill volumes talking about that subject and what tricks they used to get me out of business and stop talking about the truth. They just don’t want to lose you as a returning customer.

To demonstrate what a dead-end road the dieting approach can be, Dr. Solomon explains:

“A lot of people like the idea of being told what to do when they are frustrated; initially; that’s part of the appeal of the diets. ‘I’m tired of thinking about food; I don’t want to spend one more minute thinking about it; Just tell me what to do and I’ll do it; Just give me a set of rules and I will follow them.’ The problem is that the rules are impossible to follow and then people blame themselves. It also brings up resistance in people. Weight loss issues in general they really bread resistance. There is something inside of us, we don’t like being told what to do, even by ourselves. We all have these little 5 year olds inside of ourselves saying, ‘I’m not going to do it! You can’t make me!’ Like a 5 year old, stomping her feet. So dieting really perpetuates that cycle of making rules and breaking them that leads into those bigger issues of craving nourishments and gratification but not really allowing yourself to have it. So we end up feeling deprived.”

By passing the responsibility over our weight and body on to a false diet ‘expert’, we not only become dependent, we also willing pass the power over ourselves and our lives to someone else. No wonder why millions of overweight women feel so powerless. This is a crazy downward spiral nobody can win.

We’re trying to control something, and yet we feel out of control. That keeps us feeling small and powerless and it’s a real downward spiral which gets worse and worse. Women often don’t see a way out of that situation and start feeling very stuck. It’s easy to get into that situation but hard to find a way out. You eat too much and then you feel like you should deprive yourself the next day. So you eat less because that’s what all the books and doctors are saying: ‘Eat less and exercise more.’ But they never tell you how to do that in a way so that you can really stick to it. The reason is that they are not knowledgeable about the emotional part of it, so they can’t tell you how to address these emotional issues.

At the beginning I said that you can’t deal well with emotions through willpower. Emotions are emotions and will is will. Both happen on a completely different level. And it’s the same with diet. You can’t deal with emotions by eating less. That is simply stupid. When it comes to emotional eating, the real issue is emotions. So you have to deal with those instead of oging on the next diet.

Stress causes emotion, tension, fatigue and a lot more…all reasons that are driving us to the refrigerator. A lot of times you don’t even realize what’s happening there and why you are looking for food.

Diets are so counter intuitive; when we really think about what diets are. We are so used to the dieting approach that we have totally un-learned how to listen to our body, to our common sense, to our own intuition. And that’s what surprises me so much, that we really have lost our common sense in all that. Dr. Solomon said that statistics say that we gain 107% after a diet and I think that everybody reading this would agree. Yet people do it again and again, they do something that doesn’t work that has a 107% to fail! That is simply insane.

So what choices do you have during the Holiday season to deal with food? Give in and eat as much as you can and then jump on the next diet in January? Or depriving yourself while everybody else on the table is enjoying the food?

There is a better way. Mindful eating.

Enjoy the food you eat. Eat a lot of salad first. Drink a glass of water before the meal (you already knew that one). Eat mindfully. Be grateful for the food and the company. You can eat everything on the table as long as you eat slowly and enjoy each and every bite. After such a meal you will feel happy instead of remorseful. 

We have to gain back the trust in ourselves, and this starts by taking responsibility over our own emotions. And it also starts by saying ‘Stop’ to the insanity and by beginning a normal, healthy lifestyle and reducing stress.

Some day in January I’m going to start with my SheSlimEasy Habit Transformation. Since I will only work with 20 participants, the group my fill fast. The last time I offered such a program, I was booked for 2 years in advance, and that within the first two weeks of January. So, if you feel that the SheSlimEasy method might be a good way for you as my subscriber can already register now and start with the program. I promise, it will not interfere with your Holiday feasts. I would like you to first go through my free webinar so that you understand what tis program includes and what you can expect. You can access the recording of the webinar here: https://cdm.weightlossexpertsrevealthetruth.com/webinar-truth-weightloss-registration.

Enjoy your Holidays….and happy slimming!

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Is your health and weight loss goal worth five to fifteen minutes of your time every day?

If you want to learn a process that leads you to constant weight loss success by baby stepping, check out my Facebook group. 

You can get a feeling for the 4 Pillars of Weight Loss process for free. Simply join my closed Facebook group where you can go through the process by taking tiny daily baby steps completely stress free and still make tremendous progress. 

https://www.facebook.com/groups/4pillarsoflastingweightloss

Are You Following The Masses Or Are You Losing Weight?

Can you believe it? There are only five more weeks left to the end of this year. This is the time when people begin to think about their goals they wanted to achieve this year but didn’t. Millions of women are beginning to realize that, once again, they did not achieve their weight loss goal. And once again they blame themselves.

And at the same time they say, “Well, the year is almost over anyway. So let’s enjoy the holiday season and eat whatever I like. I can start again in January.” And so it goes from year to year.

There is something about that pattern that puzzled me for many years and I just didn’t understand why millions of women are following a path that has no chance to bring the desired results.

I believed them when they said that they are serious about their weight loss. So why would they go and just jump on the next diet although they never had a real chance of getting lasting results? Like sheep in a herd they are following the newest weight loss hype, although their common senses have warned them at the very beginning.

It took me quite a while to understand that the problem is the ‘herd’ mentality. The herd gives people a false sense of safety and security. It’s the herd mentality we humans have.

When you set a goal, you know that you want to achieve it, and you are willing and ready to do whatever it takes. But there is also another level that has a word: your subconscious mind, and that’s a whole different story.

What’s going on subconsciously is – unfortunately – much stronger than your mind. Your subconscious mind wants to keep the status quo. It wants you to do what is known. It wants the safe route. It wants to do what all the other people are doing. It wants to do what you have always done.

Something new? Go away!

Something I have never heard of before? No way!

If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.

So your mind goes, “Yes, that body-mind-spirit theory makes total sense. I get that a weight loss strategy has to meet individual needs. I want to lose my weight for good, not just lose a few pounds and then gain them back. I understand that weight loss diets have an opposite effect and lead to yo-yoing. It makes sense that I first have to eliminate the root cause before I can achieve my final goal.”

But then you see an ad or an article about a new program with just a slight twist but not really anything new or anything you haven’t already tried before. Or you hear Oprah talk excitedly about an new diet, and your subconscious mind goes, “Well, so many women had success with that method, so it must be good. Since Oprah or Dr. Oz says it, it must be true. Maybe that dietitian or expert has just found the right twist that finally works. Those before-after pictures look so great and I want to look like that woman as well. Hundreds of clients can’t be wrong. Dr. Oz can’t be wrong. Oprah can’t be wrong. So let’s take the safe route and give that diet another try.”

The thing is that neither Dr. Oz nor Oprah or any other person who publically talks about a new weight loss program is wrong per se. Some tactics actually do work for some people for some time. That’s why they come across as so credible – because they truly believe what they are saying. But they are not the ones who work with clients for years and decades to see the long-term results.

NO tactic works for everybody all the time. 

Behind that mentality is a two-dimensional thinking. Recently a member of my Facebook group commented on one of my posts that weight loss ALWAYS has to begin with a liver cleanse and that she is having some great results. That’s two-dimensional thinking. Do A and you will get B. Some experts really say that about liver cleanse and it’s not entirely wrong. But it’s not entirely correct either.

So let’s take that example with the liver cleanse because it’s a great one.

There are many overweight people with a liver problem, and for them the liver cleanse early in the weight loss process is, indeed, very important. But, in order for the liver to deal with that cleanse, you have to prepare it, for example with a colon cleanse or with an increased water intake. Or maybe the liver needs some supplements to do a better job. But then, what about the kidneys? Or, or, or….Our body is just not a machine and we all are very individual. That’s another reason why neiter diets nor any weight loss supplements make any sense. They simply don’t address the root cause. 

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8 Weight Loss Experts reveail the truth about maintainable weight loss for women and share valuable tips. 

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There are so many variables, so many individuals, and so many shifts and changes we have to make in our weight loss strategy to make it work personally and individually.

A + B = C is not true for every woman when it comes to weight loss. Again, this is tactical, two-dimensional thinking. A few hundred years ago people believed that the earth was a disc and they had great proof of that theory: they could not see beyond the horizon. Again, two-dimensional thinking.

For even the stupidest diet in the world you can find some proof that it works. But is it healthy? Does it work for everybody? Will the results last? No, no, and absolutely no.

I usually do classes of 20 participants, and in over 38 years of working as a weight loss coach, the causes we detect together never fail so surprise me. Recently one of my participants found out that one of her causes was something her father said when she was a young teenager in early puberty, not feeling like a child anymore but not feeling comfortable in the body of a woman either. Henceforward she was ashamed to become and be a woman and subconsciously tried to hide her body behind the fat. Would she ever have found her root cause alone? Maybe, but not likely.

In a class of 20 I usually have at least 20 different causes. Jessica, for example has found cause A, B and E to be effective for her; Mary’s causes are A, C and F, while Freeda found out that the causes C, G, L and N are a problem in her case.

Just think about, seen in that light, how much sense does any tactical advice “Do A to get B” make? It’s like the follower who tried to convince me that for everybody the first step had to be a liver cleanse. But what if your root cause is a psychological one? What if one of your causes is a hormonal problem? What if it’s a lack of sleep? Yes, cleansing the liver is always a good idea early in the process, but it’s not the only tactic and it’s certainly not for every woman to use it as a first step. This is just an example. You can take every recommendation regarding weight loss you have ever heard and use that same logic.

It’s that tactical, two-dimensional thinking that makes people believe that what works for them must also work for the rest of the world, which is not only arrogant but also quite ignorant. Here again it shows that a little bit of knowledge can be more dangerous than no knowledge at all.

Let’s assume that you had been molested, raped or abused in any way and your extra fat serves as a protective shield; and let’s assume that I’d come and say, “The first step has to be a liver cleanse,” or, “Go on that banana diet, it worked great for me.” Or let’s assume that you have some real bad habits and I’d tell you, “The first step has to be a liver cleanse”. Rightfully you would shake your head and think, “Stupid woman”. Yet this is exactly what’s going on in the weight loss market place for decades. Women are being sold to the most stupid tactics and vastly taken advantage of. Believing all that misleading information is not better than believing our earth was a disc. 

There are some basic things I recommend every overweight woman to add to their weight loss strategy, and cleansing and detoxification is a part of it. Did you hear me? A PART, not the solution, and not always the first step. 

Regarding maintainable weight loss, we have to understand the difference between a tactic and a strategy. A tactic is one single method (i.e. a diet, or a liver cleanse, or exercise, or a weight loss pill, or gastric surgery, for example) while a strategy contains several steps and methods (i.e a healthy lifestyle, and overall cleansing, and detoxification, and mindset changes, and transformation of the psychological causes,etc.) . A tactic may win a battle or two, but it’s the strategy that wins the war. A diet (= tactic) can help lyou lose some weight, but it you want to get slim for good, you need a strategy (a group of several methods). 

A tactic may win a battle or two, but it’s the strategy that wins the war.

This means that we first find some root causes and then we create a personal strategy for each individual.

Again, there are a few things that should always be included, and that’s a healthy lifestyle and the transformation of some poor habits. Without a healthy lifestyle and supportive habits even the best strategy has not a good chance to bring maintainable results. In my eyes, regular overall cleansing and detoxification (not just liver cleansing) is part of a healthy lifestyle. That is something we can generalize. But all the rest is very individual.

The really, really good news about this is that when you use a great strategy that includes your body, your mind, your emotions, your habits, and your psychology, you will not only lose weight for good, but in the process you will improve every other aspect of your life: your love life, your relationships, your professional or business success, your overall health, your financial situation, even your spiritual life will deepen, if you want that. As soon as you’re happy in your own body, the world around you will change in many positive ways. 

So what can you do right now?

You have the choice. You can keep following the masses, what is okay as long as you are okay with the results. Or you can sit down, take a few minutes and make a decision:

  1. Do I want to keep yo-yo dieting or do I want to find a solution that brings lasting results?
  2. Do I want to follow the masses/the herd or am I willing to discover a new path that is best for me?
  3. Am I willing to leave the beaten track and to make new experiences, even though this may mean that I can’t follow a “Do A and you will get B” advice anymore?
  4. Do I want to begin 2022 with another diet or do I want to get down to brass tacks with my weight and release it for good, no matter what, no matter how?
  5. Am I okay with temporary results or am I ready to kiss my extra fat goodbye forever?
  6. Does remaining in the current status quo feel so safe to me that I want to stay in this state for another year or am I at the point where I can finally let go of my extra weight?

As soon as you come to the point where you are ready to leave the diet path and make new and better experiences, I’m here for you and I can’t wait to work with you. I promise this is going to be an exciting journey and you will love it.

Now is the right time to think about what you really want. In January it might be too late, because then you will be inundated with messages about the newest XYZ diet and weight loss program. Yes, I will be there and ready to offer you my program as well, but my voice will not be the loudest. The question is, will you hear my voice or will all the noise out there speak louder to you?

The choice is yours.

Happy slimming :-). 

Your Self-Worth Determines Your Weight Loss Success

How do you feel about yourself?

Do you think you have a healthy feeling of self-worth?

Most overweight women I know have rather a lot to complain about themselves, their body and weight. They just never feel ‘good enough’. They criticize their body, even condemn it. On top of that, they think that having a good sense of self-worth is not high on their priority list, or even worse, they completely ignore that part of their being. 

Feeling worthy determines how you think and act, which ultimately influences any outcome of your life, be it professionally, in your relationships, your finances, your health, and of course your weight.

Women who don’t have a healthy feeling of their self-worth just can’t keep up with any kind of health and weight loss program. Their deep conviction is that they are not worthy to be healthy, beautiful, slim and attractive. And that is such a crucial point that I just have to talk about this topic, whether you like it or not.

If you don’t have a strong sense of self-worth, you will likely fail with any kind of weight loss method.

As a matter of fact, it would be a real miracle if you could work successfully through any weight loss program without a healthy feeling of self-worth.

Did you ever ask yourself what self-worth really is?

Is your self-worth determined by how much money you have in your bank account or how much you are worth to the market place? 

Is it about how you feel about yourself?

Is it about loving yourself unconditionally?

No. Yes. And Yes. But that’s not all.  

The true definition of self-worth is rather intrinsic and internal than external.

Your self-worth has nothing to do with your current weight. It has little to do how successful you are in your job or business. Your self-worth is not determined by the number on your bank account or how many things you own. You could be the richest woman in the world and still be unhappy. You can see that very well in really rich women who need to have the most expensive handbag, wear jewelry in the multi-million dollar range around their necks, and get a new plastic surgery once a year.

If you want to understand what real self-worth is not, watch one of the Real Housewives series. That is really disgusting. These women are the best examples of being shallow and lack any sense of real self-worth. Women with a low feeling of self-worth do not take care well of themselves, eat low-quality food, do not exercise, they often have two or three jobs just to make ends meet or to keep up with the Joneses. And you also have the other group of women with little self-worth who are trying to hide the shallowness behind tons of make-up, the most expensive cloths, an expensive car, an ultra-rich husband and a house large enough to host their big egos.

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On the other hand you can have a mother of twelve children who deeply cares for them and her neighbors, who lives by high moral standards, who is loving, caring, gentle, friendly and cleans other people’s houses with great love and gusto for little money. That woman has much higher self-worth because she has a lot to give to her family as well as to the community. She has no PHD, but she knows how to love and to serve, and she does that within her personal capabilities and by using her talents.

Real self-worth never has something to do with external factors. It comes from a love to life, from gratitude towards life, from a deep rooted love regardless of their imperfections or shortcomings, and from simply knowing that we are a child of God. No matter what we have to give, giving and serving inevitably brings that feeling of self-worth, no matter how humble that giving and serving is.

Every person has a lot to offer regardless of their education. You can’t compete in terms of self-worth. You can only compete in terms of how much of yourself you are giving to the world. Women with a high sense of self-worth do not base their own value on comparisons. They understand that their value is within themselves naturally and given with birth.

And please, don’t get me wrong. I’m not talking about self-delusion, self-centeredness or narcissism. As a matter of fact, people with a healthy feeling of self-worth are by nature humble beings who treat others with the same respect treat themselves. Regardless of their religion, and whether or not they are aware of, deep inside they feel that they are a divine being. They just see everybody as a valuable person, regardless of their upbringings, status, profession or the number on their bank account.

People with a low self-worth break down when they lose the job, go broke, lose friends, lose a spouse, lose their status, grow old or experience any kind of loss. They feel less worthy because they measure their self-worth on external things, situations and on others.

Real self-worth is based on a feeling of being loved by others or a deity as well as by yourself.

On the other hand, a lack of self-worth leads to anxiety, a lack of motivation to take care of themselves, a lack of motivation to accomplish more and become a better version of themselves. A lack of self-worth can even lead to addiction, depression, or suicide. And a lack of self-worth definitely leads to relationship problems. On top of that it makes you vulnerable to being hurt by others. 

A lack of self-worth leads to self-sabotage when you’re going on the next diet or weight loss program…because deep within you feel that you’re not worth looking good.

A person with a healthy feeling of being worthy is ready to take on bigger tasks and is willing to solve bigger problems than someone with a love self-worth who don’t even try in fear of failing.

People with a healthy understanding of their self-worth know that they are not perfect, they know their mistakes, their failings, yet they love themselves nonetheless. They understand that failing does not determine their self-worth a bit. They understand that results are mostly outside of our total control, yet they give their best nevertheless because they know that all we can do is giving our best.

Do you begin to understand why losing weight for good with a low feeling of self-worth is close to impossible?

With a low feeling of self-worth you tend to go for the quick-fixes because you don’t trust yourself and your inner strength and power. You follow the beaten path a dozen times even after you realized that diets don’t work…when you follow the masses and fail, then you at least are not alone with the failing. You try again because X said this about a particular diet. You’d rather follow the stream of the millions of other failures than trusting your gut feeling and trying something new.

For example, when people learn about the dangers of microwave ovens they always say, “Somehow I always had the feeling that they’re not good, but everybody else had them and the newspapers keep telling us they were safe. So I thought that the government would have told us that they are a health threat.” So instead of trusting their gut feeling, they followed the masses and put their families and themselves in serious health danger.

Now let’s talk about how to improve self-worth.

First of all, being a spiritual person who understands that we are all divine beings by nature and thus perfect in God’s eyes find it significantly easier to gain a healthy feeling of self-worth without becoming arrogant.

But just knowing that God loves you is not enough. You have to learn to unconditionally love yourself regardless of your current weight or shape. If you can’t love yourself now, start with being grateful about your body.

Then keeping your word towards yourself is the next important step. Whenever you decide to do something, do it no matter the weather or the circumstances. Just keep your word, even you gave it to yourself and although no one else knows. YOU know. Not keeping your word towards yourself lessens your integrity and thus your self-worth.

If you have experienced lack of love, conditional love, setbacks, and restrictions earlier in your life, then it’s certainly easier for you to stay in that state of low self-worth. But that’s not the solution. You don’t need others to tell you what a great person you are. You don’t need others to love you so that you can love yourself. Simply start by treating yourself well. Take care of your health. Eat healthy. Exercise. Do something good for yourself. Pamper yourself from time to time. Pat your shoulders each time you have accomplished something or made another person happy. Be generous with your smiles when meeting others. Be of service. Make this world a better place no matter how humble the beginnings.

Stay away from toxic people. Become your own best friend. Treat yourself like you would treat your best friend.

Cut off the negative self-talk and criticizing. Stop weighing. Stop beating yourself up! Talk nicely and gently about yourself. Always choose the best when it comes to your health and weight loss.

Change the voice in your head and begin to accept, respect and even love yourself for who you are right now and what you are capable of. And then watch how you will evolve miraculously.

If you had a real tough upbringing where you were beaten up or even punched, you might want to consider signing up for therapy. You can choose any local therapist or hire me if you want to go beyond therapy and go through a real life transformation.

Love yourself. You’re worth it! And start losing weight…

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Is your health and weight loss goal worth five to fifteen minutes of your time every day?

If you want to learn a process that leads you to constant weight loss success by baby stepping, check out my Facebook group. 

You can get a feeling for the 4 Pillars of Weight Loss process for free. Simply join my closed Facebook group where you can go through the process by taking tiny daily baby steps completely stress free and still make tremendous progress. 

https://www.facebook.com/groups/4pillarsoflastingweightloss

Healing Excess Weight Through Appreciation

Recently I stumbled on the following story which I find very inspirational. When I read it, I instantly had to think of you. So I decided to share that story with you today. 

Enjoy reading it!

 

Appreciating Appreciation

by Michael Josephson

There’s a song called “Thank God for Dirty Dishes” that makes the point that if you’re lucky to have enough food to make dirty dishes, you should be grateful.

So instead of grousing about your property taxes, be thankful you own property. When you have to wait in line at the bank or are stuck in traffic, just be grateful you have money in the bank and a car to drive.

It makes sense, but that doesn’t make it easy.

I have to admit that appreciation has not been a natural attribute for me. In my more ambitious days when I believed that excess was not enough, gratitude seemed like a form of surrender and a very poor life strategy. After all, if you’re satisfied with the way things are, you’ll never make them better.

What a pity I had to reach my 50s before I began to appreciate appreciation. I finally began to see that it was irresponsible and irreverent not to realize how many things I should feel grateful for. I also came to realize how good it feels to acknowledge how good I have it.

Real gratitude is much more than politeness, like saying thank you when someone passes the salt or conveys good wishes; it’s a deeper psychological state of genuine thankfulness.

Whether we believe whatever good fortune we have is the product of our own labor and talents, random luck, or a gift from God, the fact remains that each of us could spend a full day identifying all the things that merit gratitude.

According to an old proverb, “If you never learn the language of gratitude, you’ll never be on speaking terms with happiness.”

I’m still a beginner, but it’s true; the more I appreciate, the happier I am. That’s a lesson I want my children to learn.

For years I am trying to convince my readers and clients to practice appreciation toward their body, because appreciation can really heal many wounds, especially the wounds of the soul. I do get how hard it is to appreciate a body which is overweight or even obese, a body you don’t like. But sometimes it just takes a small step beyond the ordinary, a step into the unknown, an uncomfortable step, even a step that might seem weird at the beginning to make new and desired experiences and see better results. 

Why can and should we appreciate weight issues?

  1. First of all we should be thankful that we have a body and thus that we have life. Without your body you would not have anything to complain because you would not have a life. You wouldn’t exist in this form. 
  2. Even a bigger reason to be thankful and appreciative our body is the very fact that it is overweight. When the body accumulates extra fat, it always has a reason for it. Under normal circumstances our body doesn’t have a problem to burn extra fat. But sometimes it needs to accumulate fat in order to safe your very life. Two very common reasons for that are being undernourished (through intensive dieting or real famine) or an accumulation of acid and toxins which need to be stored away safely from our vital organs and the blood stream (the fat serves as “storage room”). 
  3. Very often extra fat serves a psychological purpose, for instance when a woman feels unsafe or in danger. So the body helps her to gain extra protection or a “buffering” so she can’t be hurt that much. 
  4. Most of the time excess weight is simply your body’s way of talking to and trying to alert you that there is something “out of balance”. 
  5. Many women like to “hide”; they don’t want to step up and show their talents, they play small for different reasons. To them the extra fat serves a very important purpose. 
  6. Then there are women who don’t like sex or they don’t want sex with their husband. When they belong to the group of women who find it hard to say ‘No’, their body finds a solution to say ‘No’ in their behalf by accumulating so much fat that they are no longer attractive to their partner. Of course that is entirely unconscious and bypasses the mind. 

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Whatever the root cause behind weight accumulation is – yours might be a completely different one than mentioned above -, the body always has a purpose, and thus you have plenty of reasons to show your body your appretiation and be thankful for what it is doing in your behalf. Although this completely bypasses the mind and we often don’t understand what’s going on, your body is actually doing you a tremendous service. Many women, including myself, wouldn’t even be alive anymore without the extra fat. 

And if that all is not enough reason for you to be thankful to your body, how about appreciating everything your body is doing every minute and second of the day, 24/7, 52 weeks of every year? Each second of the day our body is doing a million different things to keep that “machinery” going and keeping you healthy and alive without your collaboration and often even despite of all the bad things you are doing to your body and all the verbal punishment. 

Today I want to challenge you to make a test for the next seven days. 

Write a list of everything you can be thankful for to your body and everything you like about it. Then keep writing that list for seven days minimum. Every morning after waking up and every evening before going to sleep you thank your body for everything it is doing for you. Try to be serious. Remember, you have plenty of reasons to be genuinely thankful for to your body. 

Then, in seven days from reading this article, you post your experiences below. I bet you will feel very differently and have gained a better relationship with your body. Some results are no less than miraculous.

Happy slimming!

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Is your health and weight loss goal worth five to fifteen minutes of your time every day?

If you want to learn a process that leads you to constant weight loss success by baby stepping, check out my Facebook group. 

You can get a feeling for the 4 Pillars of Weight Loss process for free. Simply join my closed Facebook group where you can go through the process by taking tiny daily baby steps completely stress free and still make tremendous progress. 

https://www.facebook.com/groups/4pillarsoflastingweightloss

Case Study Giselle: From a life in ruin on all levels to having it all

Case Study Giselle: From a life in ruin on all levels to having it all

Three months ago Giselle (56 years) contacted me because her massage therapist recommende me to her. After a short communication on the phone she decided to sign up for my one-on-one coaching. I soon realized that she was going to be one of my hardest cases in my entire coaching career. At the beginning she has been a very difficult person, she would not listen to what I said and constantly interrupted me. “That is going to be a tough year for me” I thought. Back then I had no idea that she would become one of my strongest cases studies within the matter of months. 

On the very first coaching call she brought up all her problems at once and it was a real challenge to dig through the clutter and to choose the most pressing issue to begin with. She had pretty much all the problems you can have: deep depression; financially broke; unemployed; she had no idea what kind of job she wanted – all she knew was that she no longer wanted to work as a nurse; she had no more energy left and has gained a lot of weight (close to being obese); a daily almost crippling head ache; in a relationship she was deeply unhappy with; having been abused by her father; an extremely dominant mother who thought that Giselle was not capable of accomplishing anything and thus made all the decisions for her and even took over the job of raising her child.

All men in her life were bossy, treated her like a child, and dominated her. Besides her mother and sister, also her girlfriends always told her what she had to do and not to do. Everyone in her life seemed to know better what was good and right for her than she knew herself. Needless to say that her self-esteem was non-existent. She felt like a big, fat failure and told me that she no longer wanted to live that way. Her entire life was a real disaster and every part of her life was in ruins. I was certain that we would have to spend between one and two years together in order to address all these issues. 

That was three months ago. 

For the first two months it seemed as she was making almost no progress. She constantly sabotaged the action steps – she either didn’t do them or did them in another way than I explained it to her. 

The first thing that happened was that she became emotionally free from her dominant mother and her abusive father. That was really a big one. 

After some job interviews she realized that she no longer wanted a job and put an add in the newspaper offering her service as a caretaker for elderly people. Within only a few days she got two great engagements and now she is her own boss, deciding how much her work is worth and making the price. Now she earns more money than she has ever earned before as a nurse and has not to work any night shifts anymore. 

Then she had a longer phone call with her daughter and their relationship began to improve. 

On the other side, the relationship with her boyfriend began to briddle very quickly and soon she realized that she was no longer emotionally attached to him. He doesn’t fit in her life anymore because she no longer needs a father figure (he is 26 years older than Giselle). When I told her that this would open herself up for a new and better relationship she instantly refused and said that she was done with men and that she didn’t want another man in her life anymore. One day her boyfriend called her “baby” as he always does. Without thinking or giving it a second thought, Giselle was bursting out, “I’m not a baby, I’m a lady!” That was the first time we got a glimpse of her real inner strength. From that moment things started moving very fast. 

Then, suddenly her health improved dramatically. Whereas she would be in bed all day long and sleep 12 hours every night before, she suddenly had more energy and started making changes in her apartment and shifting things around. Her brain fog was gone, her memory improved and she could better concentrate. Now she could do a better job with her clients and has more stamina. 

She began to be more careful about when and how much she would allow her bossy sister and girlfriends into her life and what she would tolerate from them. She learned to say ‘No’. For the first time in her life she could set boundaries and clearly say what is tolerable and what is not. 

In other words, she has been cleaning out and decluttering her entire life. 

During all that time we never did anything regarding her weight and she never weighed. She occasionally complained about her weight and I kept reassuring her that her body was taking care of the weight itself. And it has. Three weeks ago she told me that she had lost several kilograms and since then she is constantly losing weight. 

Two weeks ago she met a lovely man who is 10 years younger than Giselle – the kind of man she always wanted and was certain he would not exist. They both fell in love with each other and both feel that the other one is just the “one”, the partner they have always been looking for and dreamed of  but never found before. Very quickly they realized that everything fits. Beside the fastly growing love, they have many common interests, he treats her with the respect she deserves, and they have the best sex life ever. They both feel that they have arrived. 

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And – ladies, listen well now – he said that she doesn’t need to lose weight because he loves her the way she looks like. 

Does this all sound too good to be true to you? I would have thought so three months ago. If this was your first thought, then maybe life has not been very friendly to you in the past. Maybe you have given up believing in miracles. I have seen such life stories among my clients over and over. This time I’m just surprised myself how fast this all came together and how fast Giselle could move from a life in ruins to having it all. During our 13th coaching session she told me that she no  longer needs my coaching and she said, “I finally have the life I always wanted!” 

Now seriously, how could this happen? 

Do you remember my personal story when I lost 58 pounds within a few months effortlessly without dieting or doing anything about my weight, started a new career, having the priviledge to work with over 10,000 individuals in my coaching career and fulfilling my life purpose? 

All this happened after I transformed my traumatic childhood experiences, learned to set healthy boundaries and literally decluttered my old life. In other words, I removed the root causes which had led to my weight problems. In my own life as well as in Giselle’s, it also meant to let go of a relationship which was not good for me. 

In Giselle’s case, I did nothing else but helping her to transform her personal root causes which had led to weight gain. We never did anything regarding her weight at all. She always loved cooking and she is still enjoying it and has no food restrictions except those foods she is allergic to. What we did do for the sake of her health is eliminating a few bad habits. 

Extra weight is nothing else but a signal – a warning sign – that there is something in your life that got out of balance

Since your body has no voice, it has to communicate with you in its own language, and the body’s language is SYMPTOMS. Your body communicates with you through symptoms. Once you understand what your body is trying to tell you, listen to its voice and make the necessary changes – i.e. letting go of rotten relationships, setting healthy boundaries, transforming traumatic life experiences, etc. – your body has no longer a reason to keep talking to you through extra weight. As soon as the effective root causes have been eliminated or transformed, your body can take care of the fat burning process. The symptom is no longer needed. Now the body can stop the ‘nagging’ and yelling. 

Root causes can be found on the physical level (e.g. food intolerances, diabetes, toxic overload, etc.), the emotional level (how you emotionally respond to circumstances and the world around you), the mental level (your mindset, your way of thinking, what you say, your belief system), the psychological level (your memories, your subconscious mind, past experiences, unhealthy boundaries, etc.), and even on the spiritual level (karma, stuck energy, etc.). They can be experienced in relationships with the opposite sex and the family, in your professional life, in your health or the lack of it, and whether or not your life is interesting, fulfilling and well balanced or not. 

You are a whole being and you can’t be cut in pieces or slices. Your happiness comes with a life well balanced on all pillars. Unfortunately that’s exactly what the diet industry and the gastric surgeons do with you, the only look at the symptoms and not at the root causes. They never ask WHY you eat too much, WHY you eat the wrong food, WHY you don’t like to exercise, or WHY you feel hungry all the time. They don’t look at the WHY – the root causes. All they do is trying to remove the symptom, the warning signal. And once they have done that, they don’t care about the rest and leave you alone with all your troubles and issues. They don’t care because they can’t, they don’t have the right answers. 

Another reason why my method is working so well, fast and effortlessly is because it is based on natural laws, the laws of the universe. These are laws which are true for everything and everyone. They are non-negotiable. If you jump off a 20-story house, you don’t fall upwards; you fall down and you’ll be dead. That’s non-negotiable. if you saw carrots, you will not harvest onions; you will harvest carrots for sure. That is non-negotiable. When you are a person who constantly thinks negatively, there is no way that you can attract something positive; you will attract more negativity, disease and disaster into your life. That is non-negotiable. 

When you adhere to the laws of the universe, you will reap positive things in ALL aspects of your life. It doesn’t matter whether you want to lose weight, find a better paid job, find a new love, gain better health or achieve any goal, the way to approach these goals is always the same. Just follow the laws of nature and you will manifest all these things into your life because when you do that, literally your whole life is going to improve. You can’t cut your being and your life in slices and pieces either. On the other hand you can not go on a diet and by doing so find a better job, find a new love, improve your health and lose weight all at the same time and with that same tactic. The reason is because diets are not only not based on the laws of nature, they are flat out a violation of the laws of your body. Our body reacts conversely to diets than we want and consequently we ‘reap’ the yo-yo effect.

One of these natural laws is that the pendulum swings as far to the left side as it moves to the right side. Translated to Giselle’s situation: the worse her old life was, the more the pendulum had to swing to the other side and bring her a life of good and happiness, because she uprooted the causes and changed her thinking.

Another natural law is that the more time, energy and effort you put into a goal, the more you will get out.

Right now I have ONE single spot open for one-on-one coaching over the phone. If you want to transform your weight…if you are serious about losing your weight in a healthy and maintainable way…and if you are willing to do whatever it takes to achieve that goal, then you can send me an email and let me know that you are ready to work with me. In a free consultation over the phone I will explain you the options you can choose from. That is non-binding and you can either take my offer or leave it. Once that one spot will be filled, you can get on my waiting list.

In the meantime:

Happy slimming! 

* Disclaimer: these results are not typical. How fast a client experiences positive results entirely depends on how committed she is and what action steps she takes.

Weight Loss Psychology – Where Do Your Habits Come From?

Weight Loss Psychology – Where Do Your Habits Come From?

Do you agree that bad habit is hard to overcome? In order to make it a little bit easier it’s helpful to understand how habits build.

Every day we make choices in our lives and they are not always helpful or beneficial. We make choices without even realizing that they are not the best for us. And when we get sick and overweight after a while we often wonder why. It may seem like undeserved or without a good reason. But it never is. Every condition in our life we have attracted through thousands and thousands of conscious or subconscious choices we have made in the past.

When we start looking at our habits honestly we suddenly realize that not all of them are good and helpful. But first let us look at how habits can build: the good ones as well as the negative ones.

Whenever we see, hear, experience, say, think, feel or imagine something, our brain immediately registers that information and it will be stored in our subconscious mind as a FACT, no matter whether it’s true or not. The more such information is repeated, the more it becomes a pattern, then a habit and finally reality…without fail. This is true for negative as well as for positive habits.

The way we perceive a life situation or how we feel about and react to, often come from our parents, grandparents, teachers, friends, and mentors, but also through books we read and TV shows we repeatedly watch. The first habits we adopt in life primarily come through our environment. These sources only inspired us to pick up a certain habit, but we were the ones who chose to repeat them.

Later we form habits by making daily poor decisions, mostly in an attempt to stay in our comfort zone and out of laziness. Most of the time these are the poor habits…those habits, which contribute to poor health and weight gain.

Habit is a very important function of the brain, because your brain takes over and does the things you do repeatedly so that it’s free to deal with new and unexpected situations. If we would have to think about everything we do during any given day we would get crazy or at least have a nervous breakdown.

The same is true with our thoughts and feelings. Thought and emotional patterns can become habits as well. When we repeat the same thoughts and feelings over and over again, the subconscious mind will take over after a while and bring the outer results automatically without us realizing how this could happen. This is a great mechanism, but also has consequences for us we do not really want nor appreciate.

For instance, if you think mainly about being overweight, diets, how food can make you fat, how much you hate your body as it is, you will eventually gain more weight. You then think again about being overweight and you will experience the symptoms accordingly. This circle of thinking and feeling and remembering about your weight becomes so automated after a while that you do not even realize what you are actually doing and creating for your life. And the more often you repeat certain thoughts and behaviors, the more your thinking just gets on “auto-pilot” and several aspects are repeated like a CD that is played over and over again without you even noticing because it became so normal.

As a matter of fact overweight people think about their weight all the time. They just have become so used to it that they do not even realize their thinking anymore. And the thinking and feeling about their weight moves to a more subconscious level, and although it’s merely subconscious, these thoughts and emotions are constantly there, bringing more of the results you don’t want. If you think mainly about your weight, you will eventually have weight issues…and more and more of them.

Remember the principle of cause and effect. You can’t sow salad and expect to harvest carrots. Likewise you can’t constantly think about your terrible extra weight and expect to become slim and lean.

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It also works pretty much the same with the food we eat. Our body creates enzymes to digest the food we eat regularly, and it stops creating enzymes for food we never or seldom eat. That’s why we often tend to think that the unhealthy foods we so like were better for our body than the healthy alternatives. Of course, it’s not, but our bodies simply found a way to deal with these unhealthy or toxic substances. And when we change our poor eating habits to healthy eating, it takes our body a while to get used to food it didn’t have in a long time or even never before and start creating those digestive enzymes again.

So we can really say that being overweight in itself is a bad habit as well because of repeated patterns – it has become a complex of habits of our thinking, feeling, acting and dealing with food. That’s one big reason why losing weight and keeping it off can be so darn hard: the problem is so complex. It has become automated. And this on top of all the bad, fattening habits many of us have adopted over the years.

Therefore, the bad habit of being overweight is not only in the eating, drinking and exercising, but also in the thinking, behaving, and feeling. For example, one of my former participants used to enter the gate to her yard side-wise even long after she had lost all her excess weight with WW. That, of course, created a new reality of gaining weight back in order to fit into that old habit of entering the gate side-wise. Only once she realized how she had been creating that reality of being obese through her behavior and by changing that she began to get lasting results. 

Instead of making things more complex than they need to be, it’s very advisable to start your new weight loss process by eliminating and transforming your bad habits so that you can move forward in your progress without constantly sabotaging yourself. 

All that being said I hope that it has become obvious to you how complex the habit topic alone is and why losing your extra weight has been so hard in the past. Your complex of habits has constantly gotten in your way and sabotaged even your most serious attempts to lose that weight. Why did you allow that? You didn’t know better. Nobody told you in the past. Everything you thought you knew was that you needed to eat less and exercise more. That mantra has given you a completely false understanding of the real nature of weight gain and weight loss.

We can make conscious new choices at any point in our lives. The most successful people are good role models for adopting better habits into their lives. Successful people literally depend on good habits. Since inhibiting positive habits helps people to become millionaires, why not also find out how positive habits can help you achieve your weight goal, be healthy and live a longer life?

It’s a matter of making the right choices.

Today choose to take care of your poor habits. Decide which way you want to take: alone (this may take months or even years) or with the help of a coach (takes a few weeks or a couple of months).

Just CHOOSE!

Then set a date in your calendar when you want to begin your habit transformation process, highlighted in yellow.

Happy weight loss!

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Is your health and weight loss goal worth five to fifteen minutes of your time every day?

If you want to learn a process that leads you to constant weight loss success by baby stepping, check out my Facebook group.

You can get a feeling for the 4 Pillars of Weight Loss process for free. Simply join my closed Facebook group where you can go through the process by taking tiny daily baby steps completely stress free and still make tremendous progress.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/4pillarsoflastingweightloss

How Impatience Can Completely Spoil Your Weight Loss Process

How Impatience Can Completely Spoil Your Weight Loss Process

We are living in a time where everything has to happen on the push of a button. Because of cell phones and WiFi radiation, people’s attention span has drastically been decreased. When people want something, they want it yesterday. They can’t wait, they can’t allow processes to happen, things to grow and look forward to receiving a gift on Christmas instead of today. 

A recent experience with one of my clients has demonstrated this so extremely well that it made me cry for a day. 

Let’s call her Martha. Martha has been doing very well with my system. She showed up every day and went through the daily action steps. And because she was so disciplined, she had great weight loss success immediately. Because she was so happy with my program, she decided to become my affiliate partner – partly because she wanted to finance her attendance in one of my programs and also because she wanted some additional income.

Because she was a new affiliate partner I invited her to a free four week affiliate training program where we are meeting four Saturdays for 90 minutes on Zoom. The purpose of that training is to give my partners a great start and fast income, because especially now where so many people in the USA earn less due to the Covid crisis, many people have to earn a side income pretty soon. 

Now, if you guessed that like losing weight, earning money as an affiliate might take some time, you are right. 

Martha was on the first Saturday call, missed the second one and joined us for the third call. That was before we had even started with the promotion. Monday morning I went online and just wanted to send her the good message that I will get some media appearances in her state to help her earn money faster, when I saw her message. In that message she let me know that she could not commit to more Saturday trainings (four in total) and that therefore she would not want to work as an affiliate. 

Did you ever hear about a new job which does not involv any learning? 

That woman was just one inch away from the success she wanted, and she quit because of her impatience. Over time I have come to know her quite well, and she is the kind of person who does something in a rush and then changes her mind. And I also know that my method is the only chance for her because she already had a gastric surgery and gone through pretty much all diets that exist (according to her own words). 

According to her own words she is a quitter. She would begin something and then quickly give that up and turn to something else. This is the behavior of people who are never successful…neither regarding weight loss nor in live generally. 

I see similar situations regarding weight loss so many times. When I work with people in group or one-on-one coaching sessions I see who is shortly before a major breakthrough. And so often women give up right before such a breakthrough moment just because of their impatience.

They can’t wait. They can’t allow a process to happen. And they will never know how close they had come to their goal. 

Then they go on the next fad diet, take expensive weight loss products or get a gastric surgery done which create tremendous health problems and make matters worse in any regard. And at the end they gain that quickly lost weight back because it was not a sustainable method. Yes, they did have quick success…but at what cost? 

All processes and goals require time. We can’t force things into manifestation…we can work them into manifestation. All things have their own timing, be it weight loss or becoming financially free. 

As a surfer you can’t controle the wave – you can only ride it. 

If you want to lose weight for good, you better develop the habit of being patient, otherwise you will find yourself at the end of your life, frustrated, broke, ill and still overweight, blaming anything and anyone else but yourself. Losing weight for good is very much about letting go: letting go of the causes as well as of the extra fat. By being impatient you constantly disturb and stop the process you have started. Then you have to start all over again and you will never achieve enough momentum to achieve your desired goal. And this is really sad. 

Here is what the typical diet process looks like: 

People go on a diet and then stop. After a while they jump on the next bandwaggon, and when they realize that they don’t achieve their goal as they wished, so they stop again. That way they go from diet to diet and program to program, spending thousands of dollars and at the end they find themselves at the old starting point again, and at some point they simply give up. Nobody has enough willpower and energy for constantly losing and failing over a longer period of time. So dieters are literally forced to give up after a while. 

Because of the nature of the dieting approach, people are FORCED to stop the process after some time, otherwise they would get too much deprived of vital substances and become severally ill. So their weight loss process is a constant stop and go and stop and go without gaining any momentum. But momentum is crucially important for any goal achievement process. That’s why patience is so important.

Without patience…no momentum. Without momentum…no goal achievement. 

Therefore, patience is a necessary, indispensable part of your weight loss success. 

“Patience is a necessary, indispensable part of your weight loss success.” 

Would you ever open a petal so that the flower would bloom sooner? Would you break an egg just because you wanted to see that chicken be born sooner? Would you ever cut the cocoon of a butterfly just to let it fly before its time would have come to spread the wings? 

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Nobody who is reading this article would ever be that stupid. But why can so many women not come up with the same common sense when it comes to their weight loss? 

Please keep in mind that you did not gain that extra fat within a few weeks or months. So why on earth can anybody expect to lose it that quickly? Our body is not a machine…it takes the body time to shift all the functions and make the necessary changes so that it can burn off the extra fat for you.

For your body, there is a lot of “underground” and foundational work required before you can see the results on your scale. Expecting the body to do its job much faster than it really can according to its own nature is simply not fair, it’s not realistic and it’s not sensible at all. 

Here is a simple test whether you are on a fad or on a real cause-transformation weight loss program. If you are new to my system, fads lead to fast weight loss at the beginning but the results are not maintainable; the only maintainable method is to transform or eliminate the root causes so that your body doesn’t have the need to hang on to its extra fat anymore. In other words, you change the problem at the foundation, at its roots and the problem changes itself.

Here is the test: 

If you lose weight immediately and if the weight loss gets slower and harder over time, you’re on a fad and doing something that is against your body’s nature. If it takes a while for the weight loss to show on the scale and weight loss slowly increases more and faster over time, then you’re on a cause transformation program. The first one leads to yo-yo dieting and the latter to lasting results. 

Sheeps running off a cliff (www.freethoughtblogs.com)

The problem is that impatient people are constantly demanding and screaming for the next fad diet. They want immediate results. Of course they then complain for years after the diet failed. But sure enough, as soon as the next “new” diet will be advertised, they jump on that bandwaggon like headless sheeps following one another running off a cliff. 

The lasting, maintainable approach of eliminating and transforming the root causes first is only for the smart, educated and patient kind of women. Unfortunately, many of these women have already gone through so many diets and programs that they have lost faith in their body’s capability to burn off fat. The only way for these women to achieve their desired weight goal is by cultivating patience

Cultivating patience is one of the first things for a successful weight loss process.

Happy slimming!

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Is your health and weight loss goal worth five to fifteen minutes of your time every day?

If you want to learn a process that leads you to constant weight loss success by baby stepping, check out my Facebook group. 

You can get a feeling for the 4 Pillars of Weight Loss process for free. Simply join my closed Facebook group where you can go through the process by taking tiny daily baby steps completely stress free and still make tremendous progress. 

https://www.facebook.com/groups/4pillarsoflastingweightloss

Weight Loss Psychology – Habits Can Change Your DNA

Weight Loss Psychology – Habits Can Change Your DNA

I hear it so often.

Especially women try to convince me that their weight issues have a genetic reason. They tell me that their mother/father and grandmother were overweight as well and that they will have to live with their extra weight for the rest of their lives. Yes, doctors do tell you that you can’t influence your DNA, but this is simply not true. There is scientific evidence that we can literally change our DNA with our behavior, not only for ourselves but we can also pass the positively altered DNA along to our children and grandchildren.

We are not just a victim of our ancestors and their genes. There is scientific evidence that our daily habits can turn genes on or off. Scientists call that gene expression or epigenetics. The simple definition of epigenetics is the study of biological mechanisms that can switch genes on or off. Thanks to epigenetics we know that environmental stimuli can also cause genes to be turned on or off (worst of all currently are cell phones and WiFi). Our DNA can be modified by what we eat, where we live, the kind of people we interact with, when and how much we sleep, how and how often we exercise, and the aging process.

“We are not just a victim of our ancestors and their genes. There is scientific evidence that our daily habits can turn genes on or off.”

If you have thought so far that you’re just a victim of your ancestors’ DNA, this is now good news for you. It is worth to eat healthy, it is worth to sleep enough, it is worth to exercise regularly, it does matter who our friends are. Therefore, our health, weight, and pretty much our entire life is very much in our own hands.

Can you begin to see how very important and powerful it is to take care of your habits?

Over 20,000 genes and the endless possible combinations and arrangements open up a whole new world to weight struggling women. If we can reverse the gene’s current state and keep the good while eliminating the bad genes, then we’d be able to reverse obesity and weight issues.

According to The Owner’s Manual for the Brain by Howard, our daily habits can and will turn genes on or off. Our habits therefore determine whether we are opening the door to cancer, diabetes, addictions, brain damage, heart diseases, and early aging or to health, wellness, being slim, and longevity.

“Our habits determine whether we are opening the door to cancer, diabetes, addictions, brain damage, heart diseases, and early aging or to health, wellness, being slim, and longevity.”

Therefore it’s safe to say that our habits literally determine our fate. Bad habits can and often do lead to financial problems, job loss, and health issues. These results all have an effect on our relationships, on our happiness, and on our health again. This all leads to stress what forces the body to create adrenalin and cortisol which switch on a series of bad genes. These then can lead to heart disease, cancer, and autoimmune diseases and weight gain… a veritable downward spiral.

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Habits have always a tremendous domino effect, and it would be a bad decision to ignore them. Especially when it comes to weight loss, habit is at the very foundation of your weight loss success or failure. Your habits either make or break your weight loss success.

“Your beliefs become your thoughts,
Your thoughts become your words,
Your words become your actions,
Your actions become your habits,
Your habits become your values,
Your values become your destiny.”

Mahatma Gandhi

“Your habits either make or break your weight loss success.”

Here are some of the bad habits that turn on bad genes:

  • Consume alcohol excessively
  • Drug consumption
  • Smoking
  • Unhealthy eating (too much junk food)
  • Sedentary lifestyle (lack of daily aerobic exercise)
  • Sugar consumption (sugar is toxic and leads to many bad chemical reactions in the body)
  • Lack of studying (not exercising our brains by reading or learning new skills leads to faster aging)
  • Allowing negative thinking and emotions
  • Using a microwave oven (microwaves alter the DNA and inevitably lead to weight gain)
  • Using a cell phone and WiFi internet (both are based on the microwave technology which is known to alter the DNA)

Since everything has two sides, good habits can also turn good genes on and bad genes off. Positive habits lead to a never-ending positive chain reaction leading to reduced stress, better health, financial freedom, longevity, happiness, good relationships, success, etc.

“Positive habits lead to a never-ending positive chain reaction leading to reduced stress, better health, financial freedom, longevity, happiness, good relationships, success and a lean body.”

Habits which can positively affect your genes:

  • Healthy eating (natural, organic, living food cooked from scratch).
  • Cooking with love the old-fashioned way.
  • Daily aerobic exercise.
  • Daily reading or learning new skills (leads to an increase of your IQ and to more success in business or job).
  • Meditation and prayer (can powerfully turn off bad genes that contribute to various types of diseases and turn on good genes that prevent diseases).
  • Positive mindset and emotions (thoughts and emotions alter the brain’s chemistry).
  • Using a land line for calling and internet access.

It is my hope that you begin to realize how powerful habit change can be, how much easier weight loss can become and how much better your overall life can be.

Being patient with your habit transformation is too powerful, and we’d be stupid to ignore it. On the other side bad habits lead to too much stress, disease, weight gain, faster aging and suffering if left unattended. 

The disadvantages of habit are to great and the advantages of good habit are too good to ignore.

Here’s to your ongoing weight loss success!

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Is your health and weight loss goal worth five to fifteen minutes of your time every day?

If you want to learn a process that leads you to constant weight loss success by baby stepping, check out my Facebook group. 

You can get a feeling for the 4 Pillars of Weight Loss process for free. Simply join my closed Facebook group where you can go through the process by taking tiny daily baby steps completely stress free and still make tremendous progress. 

https://www.facebook.com/groups/4pillarsoflastingweightloss

How To Rewire Your Brain For Lasting Weight Loss

How To Rewire Your Brain For Lasting Weight Loss

Did it ever happen to you that you started a new diet, totally fired up and motivated. Then a few days into the diet you suddenly realize that you are eating your favorite chips, chocolate or pasta without even realizing? Or maybe you found some “good reason” not to exercise?

As soon as you are trying to change your habits, your subconscious mind will do literally everything to bring you back to your old habits.

Habits are thе brаin’ѕ wау оf engagement so thаt wе dоn’t hаvе tо соnѕсiоuѕlу process аll thе overwhelming ԛuаntitу of infоrmаtiоn it iѕ receiving. Wе live in thе so-called information аgе but our brain keeps doing what it always hаѕ dоnе; dealing with thе constant flоw оf ѕtimuli it gеtѕ whеn we are awake. This hаѕ bееn a full-time job fоr our brain since we wеrе соnсеivеd, and it’s doing that job literally 24/7…365 days year after year. In order to avoid overwhelm and constant nervous breakdowns because of the overload of information, the brain picks out things we do regularly and labels them as “habit”.

Sоmе оf these habits are simply about kеерing our body funсtiоning рrореrlу but a lоt оf habits have to dо with the way wе do things, move, behave, react to people, situations and circumstances; the way we think and perceive our environment. Unlеѕѕ we livе in a ѕоlitаrу wоrld with no intеrасtiоn with thе rеѕt оf thе wоrld оr thе people thеrеin, wе will аlwауѕ bе соnfrоntеd with ѕituаtiоnѕ where wе must mаkе сhоiсеѕ, and these choices often happen within a split second by bypassing our conscious mind. Sоmе are simple, ѕоmе are more соmрlеx like whаt tо еаt оr what not tо еаt, when to exercise and when to relax. Many оf them require nо thought though since our brain is already pre-programmed tо асt in a helpful wау in our body’s terms. We hаvе done something wеll or inappropriately in thе past and our brain hаѕ received fееdbасk (it wеnt wеll, do thаt аgаin; аltеrnаtivеlу thаt wаѕ rubbish, do ѕоmеthing differently). Cоnѕеԛuеntlу the unconscious part of our brain iѕ full of wауѕ of dеаling with situations that wе thоughtlеѕѕlу еmрlоу to make our lives easier.

Hаbit iѕ a learned behavioral response that has bесоmе associated with a раrtiсulаr ѕituаtiоn, еѕресiаllу оnе frеԛuеntlу rереаtеd. This can be things like…

  • what we eat, how we eat, when we eat
  • whether or not we exercise, what kind of exercise, when and how
  • the way we are thinking about ourselves, about food and life in general
  • the way we respond to others, situations and circumstances
  • our sleeping habits
  • how we deal with stress
  • our emotional reactions

Unfortunately, our brain does not distinguish between helpful habits and habits that are negative. When we repeat a certain behavior often enough, our brain turns it into a habit and such a behavior literally gets on autopilot.

It’s no secret, wе do have a severe weight and оbеѕitу problem in the Western world. I dоn’t think thаt wе hаvе a weight loss problem per se…it’s not “losing” extra weight which is the problem. I rather think thаt we have a hаbit problem thаt rеԛuirеѕ uѕ tо dеvеlор mоrе bеnеfiting hаbitѕ that help us make the weight loss process easier, healthier, faster and maintainable.

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https://cdm.weightlossexpertsrevealthetruth.com/lm-4-pillars-of-lasting-weight-loss603eyu39

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These are a few poor hаbitѕ thаt cause wеight gain:

Slеер deficiency

Wоrking ridiculously early оr wоrking late might ѕееm like good habits at first sight, but inѕuffiсiеnt rest can really wreak hаvос оn уоur weight. Both lасk оf ѕlеер and sleep арnеа, combined with nightmаrеѕ, restless nightѕ can change thе hоrmоnе levels in your body, mаking уоu more likely tо gаin wеight. Nоt оnlу that, but it might аlѕо mаkе уоu indulgе in unhealthy eating behaviors. Sоmе diеt ѕtudiеѕ indiсаtе thаt оnе extra hour of ѕlеер might hеlр уоu shed as much as 14 pounds a уеаr!

Cорing with Dерrеѕѕiоn and Low Moods

Whilѕt ѕоmе реорlе might lose thеir appetite whеn fасеd with сhаllеnging situations in their livеѕ, thе орроѕitе thing саn hарреn also. During a depression, many people tend to рау less attention tо thеir diеtаrу hаbitѕ аnd ѕuссumb to еmоtiоnаl еаting because eating certain foods mаkе us fееl bеttеr. We all dо it frоm timе to time when we are feeling low, but еmоtiоnаl еаting iѕ a habit mаnу реорlе аrеn’t aware of…it literally creeps uр оn thеm. Suddеnlу thе bit оf сhосоlаtе саkе оr сhосоlаtе éclair becomes a rеgulаr еаting bingе, leading tо ѕugаr spikes, gluсоѕе аnd inѕulin lеvеlѕ gоing haywire.

 

Mindless Eating

Anоthеr рооr wеight lоѕѕ hаbit iѕ whеn you ѕhоvеl the fооd in your mouth, maybe even without sitting down  inѕtеаd of taking уоur time for a meal. Such an eating habit leads to a lot more problems like stress, poor digestion, over-acidity, etc., all unnecessarily adding up to your weight.

Not Drinking Enough Water

An alarming bad habit is drinking soday pops and bottled juices which contain unbelievable amounts of toxins. Drinking is meant to assist your body in its cleansing and detoxification process. Instead, by drinking anything bottled you are literally adding to the toxic overload the body has alreay to take care of. Drinking pure water is the answer. It’s free and has many benefits that support your weight loss process.

 

These are a just a few of a long, long list of poor habits that lead to weight gain and/or that prevent people from losing extra weight for good.

Habits are such strong components which sabotage our most serious weight loss attempts and can bypass even the strongest motivation, willpower and discipline. There is nothing that destroys hopes, wishes, goals and New Year’s resolutions more and more dramatically than habit. In my Facebook group I can see it EVERY day how people are falling back into their old, poor habits. That’s why a group of like-minded people is very helpful.

You just can’t conquer habit with willpower. The only way to optimally dealing with habit is by understanding the way our subconscious mind works and using it’s own way of forming new habits. By the way, strong willpower is a habit as well. Your ways of aproaching weight loss, your ways of pursuing a goal, your mindset, your motivation (or the lack of it), these are all habits as well and can – need to – be trained.

As you may understand by now is that no matter what you, your poor habits will always get in your way and this is not your fault…it’s how your brain has been wired. And as you may also understand by now is that there is absolutely no sense whatsoever in starting a new weight loss program BEFORE transforming your poor, fattening habits first. Your habits will always set you back to your current status quo….no matter what!

I said that it’s not your fault because your brain is made to work that way and it’s true. Of course you are still responsible because you started these poor habits some day and repeated them long and often enough to form them. Now it’s your responsibility to form new, helpful, slimming habits that give you a real chance to make your next weight loss attempt last. Once your habits will be transformed, weight loss becomes much, much easier and sometimes even effortless.

In my SheSlimEasy 90-Day Habit Transformation program we work on one tiny habit every day over the course of 90 days. This gives you the chance to make small shifts on a daily basis and long enough to rewire your brain for all habits that lead to lasting weight loss.

Happy Slimming!

P.S. More information on how to form new habit will be published in my next blog post. 

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Is your health and weight loss goal worth five to fifteen minutes of your time every day?

If you want to learn a process that leads you to constant weight loss success by baby stepping, check out my Facebook group

You can get a feeling for the 4 Pillars of Weight Loss process for free. Simply join my closed Facebook group where you can go through the process by taking tiny daily baby steps completely stress free and still make tremendous progress. 

https://www.facebook.com/groups/4pillarsoflastingweightloss

30 Signs That You Are Saboting Your Weight Loss Process

30 Signs That You Are Saboting Your Weight Loss Process

When it comes to any change generally and to weight loss in particular, our subconscious can be very creative in avoiding such a change. Our subconscious wants to keep the status quo. Change is not welcome…habit is.

How many times have you decided not to eat your favorite sweet food for a month, and three days later you suddenly found yourself buying exactly that and then eating it?

How often did it feel like your steering wheel was automatically taking a detour to the next fast food restaurant?

How many times did you decide to exercise three to four times a week and then something came into your way? You thought, “Well, what does it matter. It’s just once.” But then something else came up, the weather wasn’t to your liking, your child looked like he might get a cold…and then there was the point where you realized that you haven’t been to the gym for two weeks and now you have lost all your motivation?

Don’t we all know such situations?

First of all, these are all signs that you are doing something wrong and got off track. 

Secondly, these are all signs that you are dominated by your poor habits.

And there is a third reason I’ll get back to in a minute. But first I have to take a short detour with this topic.

In 37 years of being a weight loss coach and by working with over 10,000 persons I have seen it a thousand times that especially women tend to self-sabotage their weight loss process. They start with great motivation and begin to lose weight. Then they tell you that they need a break, don’t have enough money, don’t have any time, or worse, they simply disappear without saying a word.

One of my current members recently had some great success simply by following the daily action steps in my free Facebook group. Then Christmas came, New Year came, now we are two weeks into the new year and she almost disappeared.

Shortly before Christmas we talked on the phone and I realized that she was very close to a major breakthrough in her weight loss progress. It seemed like she was just inches away from the next breakthrough. And then we didn’t hear from her for weeks.

So what happened?

The subconscious mind takes over and is trying everything in its power to set you right back to where you were before.

This is happening a million times every day and it’s happening even more now during the month of January.

People are so used to follow their likings that they don’t realize how they are sabotaging their own goals. They feel something inside they can’t name or allocate and instantly follow these emotions. It’s like being on the way to something good, then another thing comes your way that looks even more interesting you follow that like a dog follows a new smell. They don’t realize that someone else – a minor authority that should not be allowed to dominate their lives – is slightly and slowly taking the wheel into it’s hands and they are losing control. They have given up the wheel and are now on autopilot that can bring them literally anywhere but to their desired goal. 

This is the power of habit. And habits are a great way to move you away from what you really want. They are the easiest thing to use for self-sabotage. 

But how do you know whether you are sabotaging your own goals?

Here are 30 signs of self-sabotage:

  1. Not feeling alike.
  2. Feeling that you don’t have the time and that something else is more important.
  3. Something else caught your attention. 
  4. Stopping the goal achievement process alltogether.
  5. Using excuses (no money, no time, to hard, can’t, this is not for me, etc.).
  6. Being unreachable.
  7. Starting something new.
  8. Being afraid of becoming emotional.
  9. Avoiding to deal with your own circumstances.
  10. Overplanning.
  11. Lack of commitment.
  12. Using labels for your current situation, the program you’re currently in or for the coach or trainer.
  13. Labelling yourself (I’m this or that and hence this isn’t for me).
  14. Wondering if things might be going to well and easy and you might be disappointed at some point.
  15. Self-doubt.
  16. Unknown fear of the new situation you wanted in the first place.
  17. Feeling not to deserve this.
  18. Self-doubt (Can I do this? What if I’ll fail again?)
  19. I look fine the way I am. I don’t really need to lose weight.
  20. Becoming bored with the process.
  21. Feeling inadequate.
  22. Initiating conflicts.
  23. Being out of focus.
  24. Compare yourself with others.
  25. Questioning your purpose.
  26. Critisizing.
  27. Procrastination (I’ll do it later, I don’t have time right now or I need a break first).
  28. Resistance. 
  29. Perfectionism.
  30. Quitting.

Self-sabotage is a behavior or thought pattern that is holding you back and preventing you from achieving what you want and from doing what you have decided to do. There is nothing that has killed more dreams and goal achievement processes than self-sabotage.

And here is the big problem.

Most people begin to sabotage themselves shortly before a major breakthrough!

That means that they are on the right path but are afraid of their new self. When they stop the process and give in to their self destructive behavior, they stop a process that had the potential to be a success. Then, a few years down the road they realize that they once wanted to lose weight and still haven’t achieved their goal.

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https://cdm.weightlossexpertsrevealthetruth.com/lm-4-pillars-of-lasting-weight-loss603eyu39

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That’s the moment when they have to go back to step number one and start all over again.

May this not be you!

May you have enough wisdom and self-reflection to understand when you are sabotaging your own weight loss goal.

May you have enough stamina to follow through with your weight loss process to the very end….no matter what, no matter how, and no matter how long it will take. Following through with the current process is still shorter than having to start all over again…of course, provided that you are on the right path. (Please also see article “http://www.angelabuhri.com/if-youre-struggling-with-losing-weight-youre-doing-something-wrong/”)

Following through with the current process is still shorter than quitting and then having to start all over again. 

May you love yourself enough to allow yourself to overcome all obstacles and stumbling blocks and follow through with your weight loss process to the very end and be wise enough to ask for help when needed. 

The first step of overcoming self-sabotaging behavior is by being AWARE of, by being honest in self-reflection. Vision yourself being slim. Ask for help. 

Then check back on your bigger WHY – the reason WHY you wanted to lose weight in the first place. At this point it may also help to go deeper with your WHY, away from your own person to a bigger purpose. 

Understand what’s going on subconsciously and forgive yourself. Maybe you are obese for a long time and your extra fat has been serving as kind of a protective shield around you; now you have no idea how you’re going to feel as a slim person and how to protect that new you. 

Be prepared. Everybody gets to a difficult point no matter the goal. No goal achievement process goes only smooth and linear. Understand that when there will be the time when you want to run away, hide, take a break or quit, that you might be just inches away from a major breakthrough. Especially during this month this will happen to millions of women. Some of them are really on the wrong route and need to make some shifts and others are already on the right path and don’t realize it.

Everybody needs help with their WHY and with overcoming their self-sabotaging pattern; you are not different from the rest of us. Be real to yourself and admit that you need help. In my Facebook group 4 Pillars of Lasting Weight Loss For Women you can get that kind of assistance from other members and from myself. Or you can hire me for a one-on-one coaching session which is always the fastest way to any goal. During these sessions we work very concentrated and focused on the TRANSFORMATION of habits and self-sabotage behavior. 

Just be smarter than your subconscious mind and use it to your advantage. 

Happy slimming!

 

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Is your health and weight loss goal worth five to fifteen minutes of your time every day?

If you want to learn a process that leads you to constant weight loss success by baby stepping, check out my Facebook group. 

You can get a feeling for the 4 Pillars of Weight Loss process for free. Simply join my closed Facebook group where you can go through the process by taking tiny daily baby steps completely stress free and still make tremendous progress. 

https://www.facebook.com/groups/4pillarsoflastingweightloss